…hang on a minute, where was the second attempt?…it was in my head ok, I was never one for homework, stop giving me greif! Anyway spoiler alert for the second attempt, it didn’t work. I’ll give a quick breifing on what we did on the second attempt…
The Second Attempt.
Got upside down on a beanbag, put some stinky man juice in me, attempted to flick one off, stayed like that for an hour, put a mooncup in to keep in the manlove. We only tried twice as baby daddy was busy on one of my fertile days. The annoying thing about this time was that I was due to start my period on the Sunday. My period didn’t come on the Sunday, I became full of hope. Monday I had the disappointment of starting my period at work but also realising I wasn’t pregnant at work (plus just being at work’s quite disappointing isn’t it).
Anyway forget about that it’s in the past, skip to…
The Third Attempt.
This time we thought we should change things a bit. We were both paranoid about the mooncup maybe having some dodgy stuff in it that might kill sperm. I don’t know if that’s ridiculous or not but I know there are certain things you shouldn’t do or use, for example use a vibrator or standard lube. The lube can kill them and I’m assuming the vibrater makes them all dizzy and they can’t figure out where they’re going and then they just fall on the floor giggling because of how silly they all feel. I could probably be a scientist. I gave up on the beanbag, I don’t know what angle it’s best to be at but I just thought I’ll stack my bum up on some pillows on my bed and be much more comfortable. To be fair I was probably still at a similar angle in the end. I also gave up on the orgasm this time. I know that was is recommended but I thought I’d just chill out with my bum in the air comfortably, my wife didn’t do it when she conceived our daughter so I know it doesn’t have to happen.
I now have my two week wait to look forward to, my two ginless weeks. If I do fall pregnant this time I’ll be due around Christmas. This will be a really inconvenient time as it’s Edie’s birthday on Christmas Eve and baby daddy and his boyfriend are going to Australia and so won’t be around for the birth. I’m hoping that all this inconvenience will make it work, that’s how things work isn’t it? Oh and I’ve convinced myself it’ll be twins too 🙂 Everyone keeps teasing me about that but the more the merrier as far as I’m concerned.
Fingers Crossed! Hopefully I’ll have something lovely and posative to write on here in 2 weeks. To anyone else out there currently trying I’ve got my fingers crossed for you too!