Fourth time lucky! That’s a saying isn’t it?

So that didn’t bloody work! I tried telling a friend of mine that baby daddy’s been giving me dodgy sperm but apparently the fact my partner has already got pregnant with his sperm meant it was probably fine. What a bitch. We were going to baby daddy’s and his boyfriends for Easter Sunday, the day I was due to start my period, and we were hoping to take a positive pregnancy test with us. This was also April fools day so it felt like as we told them I wasn’t pregnant they were expecting me to turn round and go Apriiiiil Foooool!!!! Instead all they got was me looking a bit green and feeling a bit wobbly (I don’t do well with period pains).

We’ve now just finished our fourth attempt. I find out at the end of this month whether or not it’s worked. We tried 3 times again this month, I’ve been very lucky with it falling when it’s been fairly convenient for baby daddy. Bless him he comes to ours every time which must be a pain in the arse for him. When we were trying to conceive with Edie we would sometimes go to theirs and bring the spoof home in a little pot in my waste band to keep it warm. This time we obviously have a baby/toddler to looking after while we’re doing this, makes it a little more difficult.

Very similar technique this time as before, bum in the air, whack the sperm in, orgasm, keep bum in air. This is no easy task, I feel if I was to try yoga right now I’d probably be pretty good after staying in weird positions for an hour at a time. I also feel like I’m doing my back in. Maybe I need to do some yoga to get myself all bendy and not do my back in.

It’s 11 days until I find out whether or not I have a tiny little eggy baby in me or if I can get smashed on gin. Thinking of things that you have to avoid when you’re pregnant (or think you might be), I’m a hippy vegan who’s usual drink of choice is peppermint tea meaning there is very little I actually have to avoid, however I’ve got a really sore throat at the moment and have been sucking away on throat sweets. After glancing at google for all of 2 seconds and not fully reading a sentence I’ve convinced myself that if I am pregnant (by a whole 3 days or so) that I’ve caused the baby permanent damage. I must remember to not look at google ever again.

Right I’m off to avoid google and any sort of medicine now. I’ll be back in 11 days time to give an update (I won’t but it seems like that’s the sort of thing I should say, I’ll be back once I can be arsed, you’re not the boss of me).

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